Are you Architect?

Have you noticed how everyone who designs something is now an 'Architect' ? WTAF ?
Yes if you were once an engineer, a software developer, or a product designer you too can now carry the moniker ''Architect'. Better still no need to design things these days - you can 'Architect' them - if you're a c*nt that is.

So no need to attend university for 7 years and get any recognised RIBA qualifications just pop the 'A word 'on the back of your business card  - job done.

Smart Meters

I resent the implication that (with my thicko meter) I'm currently frittering away energy and money. I'm  not.

Relationship Vampire

A phrase I came across last week and seems to sum up a certain type of (female) nicely.

One who sucks the lifeblood (and assets) from a relationship with neither  compassion  nor conscience before moving on to their next victim..

Guess who?

Shave Clubs - Piffle

These people appear to mail-order razors and shaving foam and cost between 60 and 100 pound a year.

Meanwhile a pack of 20 Bic sensitive disposable razors (my weapon of choice in these matters) is currently two quid  and over the course of a year will provide a fresh blade every 2-3 weeks, add in a (generous) allowance of eight quid pa for foam/oil or what have you and there you have it - a net saving of 50 to 90 spondoolos to spend down the pub or on motorcycle spares - activities of a true man.

Thought for the day

I am wary of any organisation or 'project' that garners mass appeal - think Facebook, National Socialism and grief tourism*- to this end I have never opened a Facebook account, become a Nazi or placed flowers on the grave of someone I never knew.

* outpouring of public grief following the demise celebrity/member of royal family etc..

Stay at home mothers..

Am I alone in my bewilderment at their sense of entitlement? Is it so wrong to expect a little gratitude for what is provided, rather than the moaning and barracking for what has not. My (estranged) wife has car, money and time between school runs to do pretty much as she pleases (cake making hair appoints etc..cleaning is courtesy of a local single mother*..). Meanwhile I just 'sit about at work all day'.

I largely disregarded  her sobbing over how cruelly she was  treated as I found the spoilt brattishness of it too much to bear. Yet now I apparently only have myself to blame for the marriage breakdown 'you knew I was unhappy and you did nothing about it..' comes  the unconvincing mantra. But the larger problem is how to convince others that I am not the Ogre she portrays. Answers below pleae.

* the irony is indeed lost on her..

Forecast Temperatures.. Feels like!

Today I was curious about how cold it was outside and so I reached for the Met Office app. It stated -3 deg C which I though sounded reasonable as it was indeed a bit chilly. However it feels like  -7 deg C.. apparently..

Eh? except no it bloody well doesn't! Not a breath of wind (not that I  give a stuff about 'wind chill' anyway). This is just another fucking 21st century affectation devised by the over zealous media to  dramatise what is a perfectly normal occurrence.

So unless you're following Shackleton's persistently piss-poor attempts to cross the Antarctic, who really cares anyway - it's hardly life or death in urban middle England. So stick your 'feels-like' right up your anti-cyclone you bunch of c*nts.